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It’s that time
of the year
By Susan Olling
Yes, the annual Tidal Basin Weed Festival is almost upon us, a
four-week ordeal that some will avoid like the plague.
What does this bring? Lots of tourists tying up our little subway
system or trying to drive to see those dratted trees. The hordes
of school groups are in a class by themselves when it comes to being
tourists. No pun intended.
Not that our little subway system can’t find ways to create havoc for
riders. On this morning’s commute (14 Mar), three lines through
downtown D.C. were not running due to an early morning tunnel fire in
one of the downtown stations. Delays from this latest episode of
the Metro follies were still going on during the evening rush
hour. But I digress.
One of the local papers ran its yearly article about the Weed Fest
filled with all sorts of helpful suggestions for getting around the
mess at the Tidal Basin for the next four weeks. It always gets
lots of laughs in our house. Mainly because the people who should
read it probably don’t. We’ve offered the same suggestions, as
well as others, over the years to people who plan to be tourists in
D.C. regardless of the season. I’ve mentioned them in past
installments, but they’re worth repeating.
Use public transportation. Please. Even though the Weed
Fest starts the tourist season, and the trains will be crowded until
Labor Day, our little subway system is a much more logical choice than
driving. There are some things to keep in mind while using Metro,
however. Fare gates no longer accept paper fare cards, and paper
fare cards are no longer sold. You get to purchase an instant
souvenir: your very own SmarTrip card. Put enough money on
it for a round trip. The lines at the fare gates can be very long
with people trying to figure out their fares and how to use the
machines.
Try to stay off the trains between 8:00 and 9:00 a.m. and 4:00 and 6:00
p.m. on weekdays. Why? The trains are filled with commuters
during these periods. Tourists and commuters can be an unpleasant
mix for both groups at the height of either rush hour period. My
sympathy’s with the poor commuters. I have long memories of
being on weekday Metro trains with tourists who want to make
conversation or loudly wonder why the trains are so quiet.
Ah yes, this brings me to some all-important Metro etiquette. Two
simple, but important, things to remember. First, when you’re on
those moving stairs, stand on the right and walk on the left.
Second, when it’s time for the train doors to close, don’t try to keep
them open so more people can get in the car. Metro train doors
are not elevator doors; they don’t bounce back. In
addition, if the doors don’t or can’t close, the train could be
disabled. The result: y’all have to get off and wait for another
train.
Driving is not a good option to get to those trees. Lots of
traffic, and there’s very little parking. I repeat, use public
transportation. You’ll have to do some walking, but isn’t that
what feet are for? It’s hard to stifle a laugh when I hear
tourists complain about “all the walking” they’ve done. Folks,
it’s just two miles from the Capitol to the Lincoln Memorial.
Walking’s great exercise. If the whine-fest gets too loud, the
Circulator Bus is an option.
Check your attire before you leave your hotel room. Tourists give
themselves away with what they’re wearing. Mr. History
could write a few chapters describing the fashion statements he’s seen
down there.
You’ll encounter lines of people everywhere. Deal with it, or
visit in January.
Tickets have been needed to get into the Washington Monument for over
twenty years. Tourist ignorance, in this age of electronic toys,
is not an excuse.
To those who complain about their federal tax burden, here’s something
to keep in mind. The Smithsonian Institution Museums and the
National Zoo, the National Gallery of Art, the U.S. Botanic Garden, the
Capitol Visitor Center, and the Mall memorials and the monument are
free. Why? Federal tax dollars.
Years ago, something was chewing on those blasted non-natives.
People were in a tizzy. Who would do such vandalism? What
would have been a better word. Look no further than Castor
canadensis, the North American beaver. Frankly, I was cheering
for the rodents. There was a wonderful photograph of one of them
enjoying floating in its very own pool, the Tidal Basin. They
don’t seem to have made a return visit.
The weeds should be leafed out in a couple of weeks. The hordes,
and the humor they provide, will be here through Labor Day. Stay
tuned.
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