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Broke Wife, Big City
What?
Me? Jealous? No.
By Aprill Brandon
Guys, I hate to be THAT wife, but I need to brag about my husband for a
little bit. He just added the title of “children’s book illustrator” to
his already impressive resume. A title he managed to squeeze in while
working at his regular demanding journalism job and coming home to his
regular demanding wife and kids always up in his face the second he
walks through the door.
I am so proud of him. This is a guy who literally worked his way up
from paperboy to now whatever his current fancy title is at the Boston
Globe (a fancy title, mind you, that I definitely know but just don’t
feel like typing out right now).
And he’s not just a hard worker, although he is that. He’s also
genuinely talented. Which is probably why he’s succeeding both
professionally and creatively and...it’s great. It really is. He’s
amazing and deserves everything he’s accomplished. He has really lived
up to his potential. Unlike some people he’s married to.
Ha! Ha!
What? No, I’m just kidding. I never had much potential in the first
place. Ha! Again. Oh, we have fun here at this old column of mine. A
column that no one reads and never goes viral. Even though I’ve been a
writer for 15 years now. Good thing I have a successful man to stand
behind.
Oh, what’s that? No, YOU sound slightly jealous.
Besides, what good would it do if I was jealous? We’re a team, me and
him. Him and me. I also reap what he sows. Especially now that we have
kids. Every success he has means we can pay the bills and not be
homeless and get as many toppings as we want on our Friday night pizza.
Including FRESH basil. More importantly, I love him and want him to
achieve all his dreams.
So what if the highlight of his week is a cool book signing event and
mine is working out a lose/lose situation with my youngest child where
if she’ll just SIT on the potty for two minutes she still gets
M&M’s even if she doesn’t actually pee or poop.
So no, I hate to disappoint you, but that feeling I’m currently
stuffing way way way down deep is definitely not a twinge of jealousy.
I fully understand why my own creative endeavours have to take a
backseat right now while I take care of our young brood.
Although, if I’m being truly honest, my husband is also really
conscientious about taking over the child care duties whenever possible
to give me time to work on writing career. Yeah, yeah, I know. Wow, he
really IS great.
What? No. That wasn’t sarcasm. I’m a lucky, lucky woman and I realize
it.
It’s just, I mean, at some point isn’t him being so generous and fair
just rubbing it in my face that I too have dreams I want to accomplish
and he fully supports them? Like, where does this guy get off?
You know what he did last week? Deep cleaned the kitchen Like,
got all the stains off the stovetop that I had just accepted as a
permanent part of the decor. The insensitive jerk. Oh, that sounds a
bit harsh, does it? Well, what else do you call doing all the chores
around the house so I can spend the weekends working? The nerve of this
guy. It’s like he is taking away all the plausible excuses I could use
for why I still haven’t finished that first draft of my “novel” like I
promised myself. He’s leaving me no choice but to accept the fact that
I’m the one responsible for whether or not I’m successful at my own
career.
Yeah. Total jerk, right?
Look, all I’m saying is that he works incredibly hard so that I can
stay home and raise the kids, which I wanted to do and which I love
doing, while also giving me time to work on my writing projects, which
I also love, and thus making it almost impossible to blame him for
anything. I mean, pffft. Right? Like, how dare he? It’s 2019, Ryan. Not
2099. Slow down with your feminist ways, allowing me the best of all
worlds.
I guess the only thing I can do is actually work hard, now that he has
taken all my excuses away.
I just hope I can forgive him some day for being such a wonderful and
supportive partner.
Can’t get enough of Aprill? Can’t wait until next week?
Check out her website at http://aprillbrandon.com/
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