senior scribes

It's No Secret
By Mona Lease

Greetings, Gals!! I've been reading since I was 11 or so. I've read "across the board".. murder mysteries, fiction, non-fiction, the old True Romance magazines, the old Detective magazines, Sci-Fi, Kent Family Chronicles (based on history when people emigrated to the US when it was 13 colonies and started newspaper businesses, etc.), Alex Haley's "Roots". Stephen King, etc.

I've read men's "romance" books...they ought to have a skull and crossbones in a fluorescent orange-colored triangle. Which brings me to this:

These books are all written with a "target" audience in mind. The books geared to women - usually labeled "contemporary romance" or "historical romance" - are geared to a woman's "emotional" side of the brain - if you will. We explored this theory in an earlier column.

The books have a "build-up" or a "stoking of the coals" before they ever kiss. It's a month of "dancing around each other"...of coy looks...of the man holding the woman's hand a few seconds longer than necessary when helping her out of the carriage or car. It's a look from the man to the woman...and reflected in her eyes...that says there is a mutual interest. And the "dance" of looks, subtle touches, and how many buttons are undone at the neck of the man's shirt  - continues.

In the man's "romance" novels (and movies) - the "woman of his heart" fights alongside of him. No - she has no "glass slippers" - they've been replace by combat boots - or some other appropriate footwear.

Guys probably only watch a "chick flick" two or three times - in the beginning of the relationship. I've heard guys say these flicks last too long...are boring. And this is where a clue lies...I believe.

See - if it's a movie of blood, guts, and gore - lasting 3 hours - that's fine with them. And I think that these same movies keep their mind stimulated (like romance books geared to women keep our emotional side stimulated)... kill someone - blow up something - save an animal or an old lady here and there - shoot out tires on a get-away car - save the damsel in distress - and voila...they're in bed somewhere.

And this "feeds" the woman's emotional side of the brain - the "knight in shining armor" (in jeans and a motor vehicle) arrives just when she has a gun that only clicks. He hands her ammo that fits her gun (imagine that!) or he hands her another gun (he's prepared!). Together they shoot their way to safety...looking our for each other along the way.

I can't believe I've never noticed these things. I don't know that there's one "magical" answer. It's just interesting to me that authors write to a specific this case...the female emotional side. And there must be a need for this. There's always new romance books to buy.

Maybe an answer is to realize who we are as woman - set a "target audience" for ourselves and accept no less.

Maybe when we raise our sons, we need to get the point across to them that women are "emotional" - that's how they are wired.

Maybe sons need to know that most women do not want to lie naked in bed with them all day.

From my observation - women do want - and probably emotionally need - the first minutes when you walk in the door after work.

Out of the romance books for men and women and into our daily lives is - the man still has more muscle mass and a "built in" desire/ability to pursue and kill an enemy. Now that we women know this - maybe a little fine-tuning is all we need.

Because I am not going to try to write a whole column on this...I'll add it here. I received 2 phone calls within half an hour of each other before I sat down to write this column. The guy sounded Asian or something. He asked for me by name. He spelled my name. He said his name was Michael Jackson. He said he was with the US Treasury. I butted in while he started with "they want" and asked him if he said his name was Michael Jackson from the US Treasury. He said yes. I said he was not Michael Jackson...he was not with the US Treasury and to never re-call me. If I could have thought faster - I would have asked him if he wore one white glove. The phone numbers my caller ID displayed were 614-771-1580 and 614-731-6111. I called these numbers. A recording says they are not in use. And this is how easy it is to be fooled...manipulated...taken. Don't fall for this...even on an "emotional" day. Our US government does not work this way.

Sometimes all you need is for someone to just be there, even if they can not solve your problems. Just knowing there is someone who cares can make all the difference.

The best is yet to be!! MONA

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