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Jesus wasn’t
Nice
By Will McCabe
Do you remember hearing from your parents to be nice if you wanted
gifts from Santa? How he discerns between those who are naughty and
nice? As a result, we are impressed early on with the notion that we
are supposed to be nice. But what if I told you that’s not Biblical?
Yeah, what if I told you that nowhere in the Bible are we asked to be
nice to one another? There is no commandment that we are supposed to be
nice, no demand for us to smile ear-to-ear to our neighbor and ask them
how their day is going.
Most of you are already disagreeing, and some of you are already
searching through your Bibles in an effort to disprove me. Good, that
saves you some time when I ask you to look in your Bibles.
First, let me ask? What does it mean to be “nice”? Well, we define nice
as being good to one another. However, that is such a vague,
nonspecific, and muddled definition that we apply it to everything. For
example, we aren’t supposed to hit people because that’s not nice, we
can’t call someone names because that’s not nice, and we don’t lie to
people because that’s not nice.
However, when we use “nice” in those contexts, we are substituting
other words and preventing ourselves from understanding the actual
reasons why we don’t do those actions. We are commanded to not hit
others not because it’s “not nice,” but because it hurts others, and
the Bible commands us “Thou shall not murder” and that the Israelites
were told that for every action would be a reaction, and that
punishment would be an “eye for an eye.”
We don’t say it is wrong to call someone names because that’s “not
nice,” but because it is an act of pride and an attempt at separating
yourself from the person you are mocking. 1 Peter 5:6 states “humble
yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that He may
exalt you at the proper time,” and Deuteronomy 10:19 says “you also
must love the foreigner, since you were foreigners in the land of
Egypt.”
The reason we shouldn’t lie is not because it’s “not nice,” but because
one of the 10 commandments is: Do not give false testimony against your
neighbor (Exodus 20:16). Not only that, but Deuteronomy 16:20 says
“Pursue justice and justice alone, so that you will live and possess
the land the Lord your God is giving you.”
Have you noticed that these passages never say anything about being
nice? Instead, they use terms like “justice," “love,” and “humble.”
These are terms which are discussed heavily in the Bible. We draw some
of these concepts when we created the term “nice.” However, “nice” is
an oversimplified, secular term which gives us the excuse not to do
anything to accidentally hurt anyone’s feelings.
Let’s look at the perfect “nice person.” They always compliment
someone, never say anything slanderous or mean about someone. They
don’t bring up controversial or depressing topics, they don’t offend
people, they don’t correct people, and they don’t get angry.
Now let’s look at Jesus, who came to Earth to be the perfect Person. He
spoke about false prophets and deceivers who would attack His
followers, rebuked the Pharisees and Sadducees, told the disciples it
would be easier for a camel to go through a needle’s eye than a rich
man to go to Heaven (Mark 10:25), and flipped over tables in a temple
and drove people out (Matthew 21:12-13). Wow, I guess by the world’s
standards, Jesus wasn’t very nice.
However, does that make Him bad? Of course not! We aren’t called to be
nice! He healed the sick, cared for the “least important” people, and
was willing to suffer and die for us. Why did He do this? Because He
humbled Himself by becoming man, He sought justice for the sin that was
plaguing us, and loved us so much that He was willing to suffer and die
to take our sins away.
When we try to be nice, we don’t correct people when they are making
mistakes. Proverbs 9:8b-9 says “rebuke a wise man, and he will love
you. Instruct a wise man, and he will be wiser still; teach a righteous
man, and he will learn more.”
When we try to be nice, we don’t want to tell individuals they are
going to go to a bad place if they don’t follow our belief system. It
isn’t nice to tell someone they are going to Hell! However, John the
Baptist was brave enough to tell the Pharisees and Sadducees “even now
the ax is ready to strike the root of the trees! Therefore, every tree
that doesn’t produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the
fire” (Matthew 3:10).
We find ourselves trying to be nice because we want to be liked. As
kids, we are told that if we aren’t nice, no one will want to hang out
with us, or we won’t get gifts from Santa. The reasoning behind being
nice is not about others, it becomes about us. Compare that to how we
are supposed to act: rebuke, correct, and even sometimes get angry,
because we are to care about other people’s souls. Jesus said the
second most important commandment was to love our neighbors as
ourselves. We must do this in spite of knowing we will be hated: Then
they will hand you over for persecution, and they will kill you. You
will be hated by all nations because of my name (Matthew 24:9).
We should still be respectful of others, and while there is such a
thing as righteous anger, we shouldn’t find ourselves purely
criticizing people for their behavior, especially if we are doing the
act ourselves (Matthew 7:1;3). There are certainly ways to correct or
suggest in a loving and respectful manner. Just because we aren’t
called to be nice doesn’t give us a pass to act like jerks.
So next time you see someone who didn’t smile to you the way you
wanted, or didn’t entertain your conversation to the half hour you were
hoping, or told you that your idea to make mittens for snakes is
stupid, instead of thinking how mean that person is or how he needs to
be nice, ask yourself this: would Jesus really think or tell you that
mittens for snakes is a good idea?
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