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ODE Extra Credit
A Parent’s Hope
for the New School Year
By Wendy Grove
This week, I am writing not as an education professional, but as a
parent. My daughter is the child that made me a mother for the first
time. Last week, she turned 11 years old, and I want to tell you about
her. She is brave, creative, artistic, smart, stubborn, self-centered
and difficult. She likes singing songs, watching anime, reading Percy
Jackson books, snuggling with her two dogs, swimming and showing off
her new polka-dot tennis shoes.
My daughter is in special education where she gets help learning
because she has dysgraphia. This is a learning disability where her
brain does not translate her ability to tell you a story or read a book
into writing with a pencil. She cannot spell or write words, sentences
or paragraphs like a child her age is expected to. In addition to this
learning disability, she is diagnosed with extreme generalized anxiety.
Her anxiety is with her everywhere, not just in specific situations.
Recently, as a fifth-grader, she received a brand new diagnosis of
attention deficit disorder. This means she struggles to pay attention,
especially during instruction. She also has been identified by her
school district as gifted in science and accelerated in math, reading
and social studies.
In less than a month, my baby starts middle school. A new school. A new
social situation. A new routine. New teachers. A lot of new kids. My
heart is racing just listing all the new things coming for her. I
wonder, how will she do with all that newness? My daughter has an
individualized education program (IEP) that gives her academic and
social supports. Staff from the middle school met with me, and the IEP
is in place and ready to go when school begins. They told me she will
be supported and wrote down how and when and who will provide the
support. I want to believe this so badly. I remain hopeful, but my
mother’s heart wonders if she really will be okay. Really, I wonder if
she will be more than okay — I want to know if she will thrive. Will my
daughter thrive in middle school with everything that makes her so
uniquely her?
In partnership with her school’s educators, I am trying hard to make
sure my child gets to be her best self, even on her most difficult
days. I am sharing this with you because I want you to know us. I want
you to hear my hopes and dreams as an educator and as a mother. I hope
that by sharing my story, I can encourage other parents to partner with
their schools to ensure their students’ success.
Maybe you have a child going through a similar transition. Maybe, like
me, you also are tired. And, maybe you have not had a great experience
at the school or with a person who works there. But, let me assure you
this: educators care. They became teachers, principals and school
counselors because they want to help kids. They genuinely want success
for our children. They want our children to feel safe and supported in
their learning. For these reasons, I must believe that she will thrive.
I believe her teachers will spend time getting to know who she is as a
student, so they can help her achieve her goals. I also know my role in
this is important, as a partner, communicator and a support to both my
daughter and her teachers.
I want to encourage you to think about what kind of partner you have
been, or could be, with your child’s school. What beliefs do you have
about teachers based on your experiences? Whatever the past experiences
have been, this year is a fresh start. Take time to tell your child’s
school about your perfect baby girl or boy. Tell someone there about
your concerns and what you hope for your child. Be brave. Use your
voice, and be confident that you know your child and your contribution
to his or her success is critical. Be present. Be open as a partner
with your child’s school. Trust in the educators’ knowledge and
experience and to the underlying goodness of their intentions to do
right by your child. You’ve got this! We parents can do this! Together
with the schools, we can positively shape the experience of school and
make sure our kids thrive.
Dr. Wendy Grove is the director of the Office for Early Learning and
School Readiness at the Ohio Department of Education, where she helps
develop and implement policies for preschool special education and
early childhood education.
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